RICK: Red Skull is Captain America's villain during WWII and an evil bent on destroying the world. Red Skull must be defeated and Captain America must win. Yet, Cap must also end up frozen in ice AND the Red Skull must get away to plot evil again. To portray this in terms of film, each scene must balanced or the ending will be flat.

BEN: Like last time, I'll comment after the first go-through of his script.

SUMMARY PT. 1 & 2
Somewhere below the Arctic Circle the Red Skull holds Cap inside a submarine.
Cap is weak and bound, an easy kill for the Red Skull. We soon discover that the Red Skull has other plans for Cap.

RED SKULL: ENDINGS - PT. 3

INT. SUBMARINE - BRIG
Captain America stands in the doorway of the compartment, shield in hand. The stinging, icy water filling the area and the hallway is now just above the knee. Lights flicker. The sound of rushing water and twisting metal becomes louder. Cap sees a pipe overhead marked "Hot Water" in German and decides to take a right down the corridor. No sign of Hilda or the Red Skull.

He goes through a hatch which he has to force open because of the water and comes to a shaft leading downward. He slides down using just the handrails. This level has less water in it, up to the shins. The ship gives a great shudder and the groaning and breaking of metal can be heard everywhere. Cap only has minutes to get out. At that moment, the electric lights go out and Cap is in pitch blackness with the water rising rapidly. Which way to turn?

INT. SUBTERRANEAN BASE - HANGAR
The Red Skull walks the girls into a front compartment.

RED SKULL
Mein Fuhrer did not like to retreat but it is time for me to get started and pop the champagne.

INT. SUBMARINE - CORRIDOR
Cap closes his eyes.

CAPTAIN AMERICA
Heavenly Father, grant me strength for what I must do...

Cap hears a loud scream, a young woman.

At the end of the corridor, Cap sees the only light. A sign in German marked "ACHTUNG" and he heads toward it. In the rising water, he is not alone. Two huge shapes come toward him wielding a fire axe and a huge wrench.

FIRST NAZI
You shall die here, weakling Amerikaner.

SECOND NAZI
Do you bleed red, white and blue? Let's cut you open and see.

RED SKULL
I expected you earlier but you Americans are decidedly late for everything.
(Still 30 yards away - there is an echo)
I knew I could count on Hilda. She was always, shall we say, sensitive.
You on the other hand were quite a gamble.
(10 yards away)
I had to find out how strong your desire to kill me was and now I know.

Red Skull now stands three feet away and Cap still has to squint. Just then a loud metal on metal scraping noise came from above. Cap's eyes adjusted. The Red Skull was dressed in black shoes, black pants, black shirt and black tie. A skull clasp on his tie and a cigar in his mouth. A glass of champagne in one hand.

RED SKULL
The submarine was actually docked to us and not the other way around. The craft we
are on now is a prototype. We will not sink like the Titanic in iceberg infested waters.

CAPTAIN AMERICA
I have come to bring you in to stand trial.

RED SKULL
I am sure you have. I am in the middle of a going away party. Don't darken my mood.

Cap rises to his feet, shaky.

CAPTAIN AMERICA
For crimes during war you must be brought to justice. For crimes against humanity you must be
brought to justice. For killing Bucky you must be brought to justice.

Red Skull sips his champagne and smashes the glass against the floor.

RED SKULL
Only the victors get to decide what is a crime! The Nazis are defeated but I AM NOT! Your weakling
friend dared challenge me. In the end, he begged me for mercy and I gave it to him, point blank in the head...

Cap takes a giant swing at Red Skull but he catches Cap's fist and holds it in a vice-like grip.

RED SKULL
I was going to offer you a duel at twenty paces (glances at two guns on hip) but now I am going to
teach you a lesson. I am superior to you in every way. I am going to enjoy crushing you and
keeping you alive long enough so I can cut you up a piece at a time.

Red Skull blows a smoke ring in Cap's face then releases his fist while pushing away.

END PT. 3
RED SKULL: ENDINGS

Deep under the Arctic Circle, Cap and Red Skull meet again. They square off and are ready to fight to the death. What happens next? We know that Cap wins this fight. Don't we? Here his facing a foe of greater strength, speed and cunning. A foe who has already beaten him easily and who killed his partner Bucky. With the war concluding and Hitler already dead in his bunker, Cap goes to face evil in the flesh in the form of the Red Skull!

Onward true believers! To the review!

INT. SUBMARINE - BRIG
Captain America stands in the doorway of the compartment, shield in hand. The stinging, icy water filling the area and the hallway is now just above the knee. Lights flicker. The sound of rushing water and twisting metal becomes louder. Cap sees a pipe overhead marked "Hot Water" in German and decides to take a right down the corridor. No sign of Hilda or the Red Skull.

He goes through a hatch which he has to force open because of the water and comes to a shaft leading downward. He slides down using just the handrails. This level has less water in it, up to the shins. The ship gives a great shudder and the groaning and breaking of metal can be heard everywhere. Cap only has minutes to get out. At that moment, the electric lights go out and Cap is in pitch blackness with the water rising rapidly. Which way to turn? >>Just remember through here, keep it in first person perspective and just give us the details we need to picture it.

INT. SUBTERRANEAN BASE - HANGAR
The Red Skull walks the girls into a front compartment.

RED SKULL
Mein Fuhrer did not like to retreat but it is time for me to get started and pop the champagne.

INT. SUBMARINE - CORRIDOR
Cap closes his eyes.

CAPTAIN AMERICA
Heavenly Father, grant me strength for what I must do...

FIRST NAZI
You shall die here, weakling Amerikaner.

SECOND NAZI
Do you bleed red, white and blue? Let's cut you open and see.

The fight commences. Cap uses his shield to block the wrench and the axe. Both Nazis land terrific blows to Cap's body with their meaty fists. Cap swings and knocks out the Nazi with the wrench. Before the fight can be renewed, a new sound comes from below, a loud humming. The lights flicker back on at half strength and Cap sees Hilda floating face down in the rising water. The fighting continues fiercely until Cap clobbers the remaining man and he too lies face down in the water. >>Fights are an interesting beast in scripts. It's a constant balance between speeding it along and getting enough detail to understand it. You don't need to preface etc the fight with "commences" or "the fight continues" just give us some highlights. That said, I've read some scripts which provide very little detail in fights (not much more than "they fight".) I prefer to give some description to keep the reader interested and give my ideas for what's behind the fight, but I know a fight coordinator's going to go to town on it. Lemme take a crack at it here...

The two rush forward. Cap blocks the wrench and the axe with his shield, but expecting the move, both Nazis land terrific blows to Cap's body with meaty fists. Cap swings and knocks out the Nazi Two.

Suddenly, A LOUD HUMMING COMES FROM BELOW. The lights flicker and dim to half strength. Cap sees Hilda floating face down in the rising water just as the remaining Nazi comes at him. Cap bashes the axe away and they fall into the water. They roll until Cap jumps up, gasping for air, then clobbers the big man. The one more Nazi lies face down in the water.

With the water up to Cap's shoulders, he dives looking for the hatch on the floor. He finds it but it won't budge.

INT. SUBTERRANEAN BASE - FRONT COMPARTMENT
Red Skull is pouring champagne with the girls in a front compartment. One of the girls lights his cigar. One by one, he moves ten levers to full power and the humming sound grows louder. The girls giggle. >>Dang those are some girls with lose morals!

INT. SUBMARINE - CORRIDOR
Cap gulps a huge lung full of air. There are only a few inches of air left now and he is pressed against the roof of the hallway to get it. He dives and returns again to the hatch. This time he finds the wrench. >>Don't need the rest here which has floated to the bottom.>> The hatch opens against the water pressure which then pushes Cap through and forces it closed.

INT. SUBTERRANEAN BASE - HANGAR
Cap's flushed down the ladder and lands with a thud on the steel deck. >>Don't need He is now inside the Red Skull's other ship.>> He gasps long and hard for air, spitting out water.

Suddenly he is blinded by giant glieg lights. They pop on one after another. In the distance a voice coming closer.

>>Probably don't need both of those parentheses, but not bad-- perhaps a little shorter. If you want to break it up with boot falls (action) that might be cool, too.
Red Skull now stands three feet away and Cap still has to squint. Just then a loud metal on metal scraping noise came from above. Cap's eyes adjusted. The Red Skull was dressed in black shoes, black pants, black shirt and black tie. A skull clasp on his tie and a cigar in his mouth. A glass of champagne in one hand.

Cap rises to his feet, shaky.

CAPTAIN AMERICA
For crimes during war you must be brought to justice. For crimes against humanity you must be
brought to justice. For killing Bucky you must be brought to justice.

Red Skull sips his champagne and smashes the glass against the floor.

Cap takes a giant swing at Red Skull but he catches Cap's fist and holds it in a vice-like grip.

Red Skull blows a smoke ring in Cap's face then releases his fist while pushing away.

Great stuff Rick! Only two parts left to end it all!

1 comment:

RICK Arthur, FounderJuly 12, 2011 at 5:58 PM
This is post 3 of 5 in the Cap vs. Red Skull finale. Like a lot of my writing, not all of it is successful. As we see here, a lot is compressed into a small period of time. Cap escapes his bonds, battles the two large Nazis, the theme of water as a hazard is repeated, hero and foe come face to face. I wanted the meeting to have impact as if the whole of the script led up to this moment. I am not sure if I succeed at all. Having committed words to page, now it is easier to formulate my thinking and the magic of proper edits and creative analysis would allow Ben and I to shape these posts into something.

I noticed while rereading this post how the Red Skull has all the good lines. In later edits, that would be attended to. Cap needs to come across as virtuous and courageous. Red Skull is arrogant, curious, manipulative and a creature of vices. In this, their final confrontation, I attempt to take the lid off of the Red Skull and have him act and talk in whatever manner strikes him. Considering himself a true alpha male, Red Skull must control every conversation, every person within his power. His flimsy attempts to corrupt Cap are meant as sport and not serious.

I wanted Red Skull to have contempt, respect, disdain, and pride for Cap as he reveals his own evil nature. Only a few lines here and there ring true. Again, being able to rewrite is a blessing. "I expected you earlier but you Americans are decidedly late for everything." Red Skull is making a reference to the late entrance the U.S. had into the war.

I want to give the end more gravity. Our story should have propelled itself to this point and now that it is here, it should seem inevitable. These two characters have so much at odds that nothing can stop them from destroying one another. I am not feeling the gravity, the propulsion, the fate - from my sketchy draft. While it is not a total loss, much of it would have to be stripped away to make the script leaner and hungrier. It is good that this version exists in so far as it is a stepping stone. I am the kind of writer that has to work for it.

Cap steps even closer to taking Red Skull down.

RICK

Captain America! Redefining Modern Myth

Monday, July 11, 2011